Food, Glorious Food

Born and bred in Penang, food is a major thing in my life. I eat, speak and cook food.

My all time favourite will always be Penang laksa but I wouldn't even look at pulut inti.

Before I start going to school, pulut inti was a regular breakfast. I have never liked it. Pulut is just not my thing.

When I decided to come here, there's no food in the reasoning but to go back for good in the future, food certainly is one of the strong point of why should I go back.

Sitting here typing this, I am missing tau fu fa, koay teow thng', lengkong, nasi dalcha, sup mamak Padang Broom, boiled crab/udang lipan, stir fried seashells, boiled cockles, 5 spoonfuls of cendol, 3 spoonfuls of bubur chacha, pau kacang merah, the abundant tropical fruits. Oh man, I truly miss the food.

Making The Conclusion

Yonks ago, when I started to learn science formally, we were introduced to protocols. First you gotta have motive. And then you gotta make observations, hypothesis and carry out a set of procedures. After you collected the result, analysis should be done and after taking into considerations of many things, then only you can draw the conclusion.

I mean, people shall not jump into conclusion that hastily. Seeing a fraction of people's life, albeit for an extended time isn't sufficient for making a conclusion, because you are seeing only a fraction. There's more to discover really and you never know.

Something That I Want to Protect

I am listening to poem recitations. Malay poems.

One after another and then I clicked on the poem Melayu by Usman Awang.

I ticked the Malay box in all my forms. I guess I am a Malay. I mean during History lesson back in high school Malay is defined as someone who speaks Malay, is a muslim and adopt Malay tradition.

I fulfilled all three so I am a Malay am I not.

And then when I heard the poem, I begin to question.

You see, when I was small, I live in this small bay at the northwest end of Penang.

There were Malays, Chinese and Indians.

Each of the race has distinct tradition and values.

It was a melting pot. We live alongside each other and hang out with each other.

And then I grow up and expand my horizon.

What I see and experience saddens me.

I mean, we are slowly disregarding our traditions and is very much westernized.

Very much so. The culture we are adopting is almost homogenous but we are, puzzlingly, at each others'throats.

As the poem goes on, I realised that most of people aren't as Malay anymore.

When people nowadays talk, they don't talk that nicely let alone softly. I don't believe this anymore for you see I have been in an almost perfect circle but when I mix into the crowd, I don't recognize their language. Even their body language scares me.

Being polite is scoffed upon and limits are non existent.

But then, I recognize the Malay described in the poem.

The Malay in the poem is the one from my first 12 years of life.

And then I went into boarding school. That place is like a hybrid of palace and jail. Almost everything is in order. There are limits and restrictions and etiquette.

And then I went to PLKN. I met a totally different crowd. The language is still familiar but the culture not. I came across many shocking things in PLKN.

I then went to do prep course for a year and I met people like the peeps from high school again and not long after I flew into central Europe.

My friends are still the almost perfect people, with manners, limits and restrictions, though they may be thinking globally but their actions are still within limit.

But then there will be summer when I will go back and see the crowd being so liberal and the people from my first 12 years of life that I left for a good amount of time have become alien to me. Why world why?

And then there are numbers of international fellow students who insist on "having fun''.

I mean, everybody has their own preference and way of having fun.

Why should you force "having'' fun on people? There are others who don't join in and nobody makes a fuss of it, just because they are minority so you don't really notice them.

People, for some people, there are something that they want to protect.

For me, as a Muslim and Malay, I take pride in not going to clubs, bars and disco. You can insist that I just come over and order something non alcoholic but then what's the purpose of going? It's not like I want to rock the dance floor too. You know what?there is something, that when you do it, it neither degrade or upgrade you. But for certain other things, when you do it, you can risk losing the values you hold. That is if you ever heard of the meaning of the word principle.

For me, there are lines that I can cross and there are grounds that I shouldn't step on. I don't feel burdened by it but it's more like a satisfication for me to be able to exercise self control.

Don't take things to heart when we decline some invitation. Plus, it deosn't look like we decline it harshly for you to be pissed off.

And let me tell you one thing. When you ask me to go to such places aforementioned with the arguement of I don't need to take alcohol, I've always have this question for you ~ and when I do that, what's next you are going to ask me to do?

In case you don't realise, I, have something that I want to protect. My root.

Geli Hati

Tengok drama. Seorang lelaki kemalangan, dimasukkan ke hospital dipasang ECG. Lelaki itu sedang nazak dan kemudiannya meninggal dunia. Scene di mana hembusan nafas terakhir diambil pada sudut yang menampakkan ECG monitor. Sebaik sahaja lelaki itu meninggal, ECG wave di monitor menjadi flat. Di monitor juga terpapar, ECG lead off. Reaksi saya -- ERKK?????

Amputation

This morning I went to listen to reconstructive surgery lectures.

In the afternoon, I went to watch a destructive surgery.

This morning we learnt of a case where an old lady is suffering from plethora of diseases, which according to our lecturer, will make a good pathological muzeum.

This is a dark joke to some but it is a reality.

If you don't get the joke, don't worry much.

Anyway, when Dr Asqar proposed for us to go into amputation surgery, I just know that I am not ready for it.

I have a rough idea what amputation means and I don't think going to watch one on a short notice is a good idea.

Still, we changed into our scrub and went into the OT.

It's above knee amputation for a 84 y.o. man suffering from Diabetes Mellitus type 2.

Basically, this surgery is done under epidural anesthesia (where you will not feel half down of your body) and some sedation. So, the patient was coughing even when they are scraping his thigh bone.

We were there when they prepare the patient and I couldn't escape from thinking about that man.

I mean, the very man who's lying in front of me, all four limbs attached is going to lose one leg. How must he be feeling right then.

It's very disturbing to me.

I handle other surgeries pretty well ~ I can watch surgeon drills, hammers, sews, punches or cut through skin.

But I know even before it starts, that sawing someone leg or transplanting faces is a bit too much for me.

Thanks Allah for those shoulders that I can embrace, watching the sawing and the bloodsquirts.

Enough with the emotional part.

I hope I won't be visiting any amputation again anytime soon.

The amputation went well. The patient was coughing sometimes that at some times, that causes the blood squirts. The mega blood squirt came last, when they cut through the collateral artery.

Surgeon will ligate the arteries by suturing both walls on the same artery to prevent the suture from slipping down the vessel.

The upper thigh is raised using a long white cloth placed from below the thigh while the surgeon saw through the femur (the thigh bone). They then smoothes the cut just like how you file your nail and stick a wax into the hollow opening on the cut bone.

The amputated leg itself is put into a black plastic and put on the corner. (Imagine having your limb in the same room but not attached on your body)

Draining tube is put under the fascia to drain all the fluid that will accumulate postoperatively and they will clean the wound using peroxide before sewing the two flabs together.

End result looks like an overfilled pillow.

Patient will be given morfin for sometime after the peration to help with the ubearable pain.

Even after recovery from operation, there will be phanthom pain. On what it is, kindly google it up.

Traumatology Operation Room

Has learnt my lesson.

All this while, I've roamed aroun the hospital comfortably in my white coat, student ID and sport shoes. So just you know, the Czech students go around the hospital in white shirt, white pants and student ID wearing socks and sandals.

I think many non Czechs agree with me that socks and sandal aren't in but in Czech it's a normal sight.

So, since I didn't do as the Romans do in Rome, I got to wear socks and plastics. Thanks Allah we changed into our scrubs. Hehehe.

Anyway traumatology operation room is interesting.

The are usually drills, screw driver and racks of screws of different sizes on the scrub tables.

There is always C-arm (the x-ray machine) and lots of blood.

I like the fact that we get adequate access to the x-ray images and about what's going on thanks to the camera and large screen in the OR.

Surgeons are the serious lots and do a lot of standing while anesthesists are the fun ones, sitting and monitoring the patients from the above.

First patient was an old lady with multiple fractures after she fall down.

She has osteoporosis and she broke her arm, both thigh bones and the right shin.

Surgeons operated on both legs.

Osteosynthesis was put into the femur with respect to the osteoporosis.

Still doctor said with her weight and her fractures, she won't be able to get on her two feet and has to be on the wheelchair.

Second patient was a man after bike accident.

He broke his tibia on two places and had multifragmented fracture on his fibula.

Surgeons had to do reduction and put the fibula back precisely on its physiological position so that the foot can function physiologically (means to say the foot can can rotate and distribute the pressure evenly )

Since the was torn ligament, they have to fix the fibula temporarily.

It's because when the ligament heals, there will be micromovements which can interfere with the fibula which hasn't healed completely.

I like it that our surgeon is willing to explain many things eventhough I catch only 70% of those explanation.

Let's face it, I'm a general medicine student and most of the time I have no idea what should I ask.

They did 180 degree x ray imaging on the ankle and all of us evacuate the OR (which means there's only the patient on the operating table in the OR) and watched the imaging procedure went by.

I had good times and I hope I'll experienced much more and gained a lot from my upcoming summer practicals.

Thoughts From Last Year in The Hospital

Being a medical student and having the opportunities to meet patients suffering from various illness, it toughens me up.

I used to sympathize them a lot, like I do to those old folks that I bump into on everyday basis.

Strangely, sympathizing has turn into admiring.

Of how tough these patients are.

We all know how does it feel to be ill.

I got a casted hand for a month and felt so much burdened by it.

Couldn't imagine how things are for those having nitroglycerin stand by for any chest pain or nebulizer in case the asthma decided to attack.

Gambar sekadar hiasan.

After a session with a crippled uncle, I couldn't help but thinking of how tough it is to lost a leg and to start anew with a prosthetic leg.

Yes, we human are blessed with the ability to adapt but adaptation with regards to lost of body part(s) is rather costly.

I don't know how did he come to term with having half hig leg amputated nor how he is coping now, seeing that there's possibility that he'll loose another half on another side.

But there he was, on that bed, not smiling yet not frowning.

And the previous woman who has half her body swollen and another half so skinny.

She managed to live like that eversince she was 2months old and she's a whooping 37 years old now.

When finding balance for toddler is quite tricky it must have been hard on her.

Come to think of it, any pair should come in two sizes ~ I mean stuffs like shoes, mittens, and even the long pants.

And how does she goes out into the crowd.