Ujian, Jihad

I keep lamenting to myself and to some unfortunate people, that I don't feel happy this school year.

It's not that people around are boring, not the subjects in second year are harder than first year. No, no, no.

It's just that this aura of negativity stretched the whole school year.

The weather mostly were gloomy, despite I had more getaways this school year, I kept myself under the roof most of the time and I have this habit of malas-nak-layan, which I detest very much.

I've been lackadaisical all this time, just to realise now, at the end of May, that this atmosphere is a test for me.

And obviously, I almost fail this test.

I know I have to collect myself, to finish off this school year and to just cap the year with something full of positivity.

Searching for the lost values and determination

When they told me about Palestine ongoings, I feel warmth gradually coming back to me

I don't really keep up with whatever that is happening outside this wall of my house (yes, my condition is that bad)

My communication was reduced to facebook, blogs, viikii and dramacrazy

My love for Palestine is nothing near strong, but hearing that some people sacrificed themselves to help my brothers and sisters

It's enough to kick me out of my blues

Telling myself, this is my test, my personal jihad

It's not dangerous at all, requiring a small bit of determination compared to those in Gaza Lifeline mission

Victory is just a determination away

Everyday is my struggle