The Reality

My day at the department starts as early as 730 am but I made sure that I came at least 10 minutes earlier.
It starts with meeting conducted fully in German. It's really German to me (read: I understand nothing). You will only know the feeling of being the only one in the meeting room not understanding what people are talking about if you are standing in my shoes. You feel totally left out and like and idiot. So, to make things better, I read the cases presented (which I later print out and ask Xavier/google translator/GermanWikipedia to translate what I don't understand) and turn my head towards anyone that's speaking in the room.

I then proceed to follow the doctor doing round, which usually takes 2 hours or so. Since Xavier came, I feel quite relieve because he's nice enough to translate for me. Done with ward round, we do blood taking. I still need someone to come with me because my skill has just started since a week ago and here, they put the patient name as invisible as possible on the bedrail.

If I have to/want to go to surgery, I'll dash for the compression sock, then to the filter room before going into the operation theather. I am practically the only intern, so I pester anyone I want in the OR. The anesthesiologist to explain me about the drugs they use and the radiologist. I usually will stand on the stool on anesthesist's site to see, ahem, surgeons' hand and instruments most of the time. If I'm brave enough I'll just shoot questions. The source of bravery?
1. no question is a stupid question.only stupid answer.
2. at least I know nobody is gonna label me Yahudi

Usually I'll go get quick lunch around noon and check out the board in the doctor's room. Sometime surgery ended beyond 1pm. On the board is written things that intern can do
1. ECG. basically you wheel in the machine into the room, stick on the ECG stickers, connect them to the electrode that goes like traffic light (black on R foot, red on R hand, yellow on L hand, green on L foot and the other chest electrodes), get the reading recorded on the 3 pieces of paper, disattach everything, get out and stick patient identifying sticker on the ECG. Since my ECG analysis is mediocre, I keep my analysis result to myself.
2. Cannulation.We also can do cannulation, which I have never tried on patient. The female doctor was nice anough to be the guinea pig when I was practising it, which I failed to cannulate eventually =(

And then the kingdom of boredom takes over. The doctors are either in the room engaged in administration works or nowhere to be seen. Even if I tried to find something to do, always there's nothing to do. So I resorted to deplete the suture stock by practising suturing or look up medically related things that I don't know.

Actually all of the staff are very nice. It just that I am still keeping my guard up, because I'm still attached to the strata observed back home and in Czech Republic. I forgot now and then to say please, greet, and say thank you. So you can say I am always on my toes, unsure and worry most of the time if I piss anyone. I guess this is out of comfort zone. Into my second week I've found my way, more or less. I print out the cases and study it, I try to to do something helpful to both me and the staff, asks more question, learn bits of German and pore on my surgical handbook, which I've never done before.

Today is a bit different. I got to scrub in. Their way is a tad bit different from Czech
"Ok, so Olive, have you ever scrubbed in before?" (kyaaa, he remember my name, my full given name. I'll be dead if he found out I dont even know his name)
"Wash your hands up to the elbow and pat it dry"
"Take the sterile sanitizer and slid it all over you forearm""
"No you head is too close to the sink"
"Yes you are doing good"
"don't keep you arms too high"
"no that's too low"
"Now up to the midforearm, 1 minute"
"The hand, take as much as you want, go through the sides of your fingers, the nails, like this"

I got to really assist the surgery. And seeing and feeling a bare thumping heart surely is fascinating. Even so when the surgeon is nice enough to explain and correct what's wrong and answer my questions. Both wrongs and rights are addressed so I don't feel lost. Holding the needle need a hang of it. I got few "this is not helpful" before I finally got "yes, this is good". I get to cut the suture and help to put the chest  drainage tubes. When closing the sternum, I was taught and made to clamp the wire and turn it around and suck the blood on the side where the surgeon is double fortifying and also to cut off the wire, which is quite tricky because the last time I twiddle with plier was 8 years ago in KH project. And the doctor showed me how to suture subcutaneously and watched if my first suture is right or not. Hold the scalpel like you are holding the pen otherwise medical pros know you are pathologist in an OR. As I struggle with reattaching the needle the comfortable way in the needle holder, he said exactly what I feel ~ everything is in your way, it's bleeding too much etc. He capped it off with saying that he hopes it was helpful for me. Obviously it was helpful. The most I got to do before is holding a laparoscope!

I hope things get better and better and I can be someone useful in the department.